Father buys a lie detector that makes a loud beep whenever somebody lies around it. The son comes home in the afternoon. Father asks him, “So, you were at school today, right?”
Son: “Yeah.”
Detector: “Beep.“
Son: “OK, OK, I was in a cinema.”
Detector: “Beep.”
Son: “Alright, I went for a beer with my friends.”
Father: “What?! At your age, I wouldn’t touch alcohol!“
Detector: “Beep.”
Mother laughs: “Ha ha ha, well, he really is your son!”
Detector: “Beep.”
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Mushroom: Wow, I look just like an umbrella.
Walnut: I look exactly like a brain.
Banana: Man, can we change the topic please?
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“Wow you look great! Did you lose weight?”
“Hey – did you just call me fat in retrospect?!”
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Why is women’s soccer so rare?
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It’s quite hard to find enough women willing to wear the same outfit.
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It’s quite hard to find enough women willing to wear the same outfit.
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She: I have a doctor’s appointment today but I really don’t want to go…
He: Just call in sick then.
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